Can you remember the name of the first girl (or guy) you ever kissed? Of course you can (Missa).

Can you remember the name of the, say…fourth? Errr. I think it was Summer, but it might have been Kelly.

Don’t get the wrong impression (entirely); it’s not that I can’t keep track of all the ladeez, I’m just struggling with the actual order. It’s kind of an interesting exercise, actually; but, probably not to the person you may be dating at the current time (fair warning). I’m no Casanova, of course, but in my roughly 10 years of dating life, I’ve racked up a paltry xx people to keep track of (and roughly divide that number in half for a full round of the bases). Not too bad considering almost 7 years of that time were committed to one person…not that it’s a competition, of course.

Or more, specifically, it is.

And so I announce:

The First Annual Kiss-Off


1. To be counted, kisses must be of the French variety

2. Multiple instances with the same person separated by a number of years and/or other relationships still count as 1

3. Kisses in any form of consciousness, inebriation, or lack thereof, are completely legal

4. Kisses garnered (remember Rule #1) with the express purpose of winning the contest are also completely legal


1. Find the sum of all people you have kissed (e.g. 5 lucky gals)

2. Subtract the age that you began dating from your current age (e.g. now 50 – was 37= 13)

3. Divide the number of kisses, by the years kissable to get your KiPY ratio Kisses Per Year (e.g. 5/13= .38 KiPY)

This seems to be a relatively equal way to compete, as it is based on an average rather than a total. SO, leave your score in the comments section, and spread the word! If more than 20 people participate, prizes will be awarded.

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