As near as I can figure, the next generation of kids are going to be super-geniuses. This, of course, is good news. All the worlds problems are undoubtedly within 10-15 years of being solved, and solved cleverly. Food shortages will be a thing of the past with the advent of never-ending gobstoppers the likes of which Charlie never dreamed of. Inflatable tortillas will stop up the gaps in the ozone layer. Oil and water droughts will be solved with their systematic replacement with Tang. There will be peace on earth and good will towards men.

That is, at least, judging by all the my-kid�s-an-honor-student-at-dorkington-middle-school bumper stickers I�ve been seeing everywhere. Everyone and their mother (literally) has one of these nowadays. Seriously, are they giving things out with coupons to Denny�s?! Ever the optimist (har-de-har-har), I intend to believe that this glut of advertising is due to an unprecedented increase in intelligence rather than a lowering of expectations.

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