USA! USA! USA!

Good game, America! Nice hustle…

U.S. Sets Record in Sexual Disease Cases

ATLANTA – More than 1 million cases of chlamydia were reported in the United States last year – the most ever reported for a sexually transmitted disease, federal health officials said Tuesday.

“A new U.S. record,” said Dr. John M. Douglas Jr. of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

More bad news: Gonorrhea rates are jumping again after hitting a record low, and an increasing number of cases are caused by a “superbug” version resistant to common antibiotics, federal officials said Tuesday.

Syphilis is rising, too. The rate of congenital syphilis – which can deform or kill babies – rose for the first time in 15 years…”Suddenly we’re starting to see the spread…”

Outstanding work, USA. Historically, the world at large expects us to be the forerunners of any aspect of life and, once again, we have excelled at STD’s, and are kicking the rest of the world’s ass!

You can go ahead and suck it Puerto Rico!