In joyous news, there’s something that I received that could really turn my life around. I’m so excited:

From: ndukadone
To: Webmaster
Subject: urgent attention

FROM THE DESK OF OBAYEMI NDUKA,
CHIEF ACCOUNTANT,
UNITED BANK FOR AFRICA-UBA,
LAGOS,NIGERIA.
ALTRENATIVE EMAIL ADDRESS: obeyeminduka@email.com

GREETINGS.

IN ORDER TO TRANSFER OUT (USD 26 MILLION DOLLARS) FROM OUR BANK. I HAVE
THE COURAGE TO ASK YOU TO LOOK FOR A RELIABLE AND HONEST PERSON WHO
WILL BE CAPABLE FOR THIS IMPORTANT BUSINESS BELIEVING THAT YOU WILL

NEVER
LET ME DOWN EITHER NOW OR IN FUTURE.

I think it’s quite obvious that my ship is about to come in.