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mmmmmm…advertising

12:45 A.M. phone rings, but not my cell-phone, the land-line. No one calls my land-line except for my parents and telemarketers. A thousand possibilities race through my mind at tiems like this, always culminating at someone being seriously injured…or worse. What will I do? How will I react? Who could it be?

Two rings, three rings, each successive tone sending a chill down my spine. With trepidation and a strange, excited anticipation, I pick up the phone, “Hello?”

Silence

“Hello? Hello?”

“beep…beep”

Damn fax machines.

Yeah, so I just met Al Gore. For reasons that remain a bit unclear to me, he visited the company I am consulting at. I said “hi”, I shook his hand, I laughed, I cried, I mourned the fact that he lost the election despite my all-powerful vote. He was a bit more rotund than we’re used to, sporting a beard, and he seemed really, really, really relaxed. He gave a funny and inspiring little speech to the 50 or so of us who were here, and he left me with thoughts vaguely of freedom.

I can think of worse ways to break up an otherwise normal Thursday.

One good thing about being a design consultant is that you have a lot of clients. Therefore, in much the same way that you would tell your parents you were at John’s house, and John would tell his parents that he was at yours, I can tell my clients that I’m at another meeting while I’m really sitting at home in my boxers blogging about how I’m blogging in my boxers.

ain’t technology grand?

and slothfulness?

Like everyone, I get my share of website referrals. The majority of which infuriatingly come from AOL search (“infuriatingly” because, as every good dork should, I loathe the AOL Machine).

It also turns out that naming my blog Stuff and Stuff was a good first step towards getting a lot of people (and by “a lot” I mean nearly dozens) to frustratingly find themselves at my site instead of stuff-animal-holder-hammock.com like they apparently wanted to. If you’re not looking for “stuffed-crust pizza” or “man with head stuffed up his ass” it would seem to me that “stuff” is an awfully general term to be putting into an otherwise specific search request.

Maybe it’s just me.

“one-armed naked asian monkey sex with underage coed girl scout lesbian titty fucks” should generate some good results…

Questionnaire

1. Would you like to make from $30,000 to $45,000 a year right out of school?

__ yes __ no __ maybe

2. Have you ever enjoyed any of the following?

– video games

– a business course

– personal computers

– working with audio equipment

__ yes __ no __ maybe

3. Would you like a career to involve any of the following?

– robotics

– running your own company

– radio or TV studios

– a Fortune 500 company

– telecommunications

– artificial intelligence

– aerospace

– biomedicine

__ yes __ no __ maybe

4. Would you like to work for companies like these?

Ameritech

Anderseon Consulting Group

AT&T;

Cellular One

Defense Logisitics Agency

Eastman Kodak

General Electric

Hewlett Packard

IBM

Intel Corp.

Motorola

Sears

Silicon Graphics

United Parcel Service

US Robotics

__ yes __ no __ maybe

If you answered “yes” to at least three questions, you’re an excellent candidate for DeVry’s degree programs!

In reference to my wild ride, some awesome license plate pics were nabbed along the way. Turns out this is much easier when someone else takes the pictures, and you concentrate only on driving…

3-D Pong. Personal hi-score as of this writing (and four games later): a paltry 212.

HA! I had lunch today at one of my old haunts. It was actually a reunion of sorts, as three of us (out of the original four) were able to attend.

What I found the most amusing was, Nancy, the lady from the roach-coach, still remembered us! She called to us in her heavy Vietnamese accent: “Hello my friends! Have not seen in long time! How many spicy chicken over rice? What building do you work in now?” Keep in mind, we quit more than two years ago, and Matt doesn’t even live in Cali anymore.

This, of course, was exactly the reason why we decided to go back, and it was hilarious. We were laughing with the same kind of glee that prison escapees must feel.

We also rain into one of our old, hated, bosses, which was less than comfortable; and, he greeted us as if we had been there all along. “Hey, the A2100 guys, how’s it going?”

sigh, shudder good times, good times…

In reference to my last post, Don noted:

You hope that’s water.

You know what? Considering how I just inadvertantly peed on the floor, I do hope that it’s just water, I really do.