Let me ammend what I said about Huizho yesterday: Huizho is a dirty dirty city… and I love it. I can’t say anymore, but I’m definitely on the short list for hell.

[EDIT] I will say more. That’s what this forum is for, after all. Also, mom, stop reading.

As I said, Huizho is poor, industrial, and not at all cosmpolitan. The majority of the people seem to work (and live) in factories like I’ve been visiting where they work double-shifts and 7 days a week. There is, understandably, a lot of steam to blow off. And so, in the name of fun, my hosts took me out for some of the local “flavor”.

Nightclubs in Huizho are not the electronica-fueled, dark rooms, flashy lights, sweating dancers kind of places I was expecting. Nightclubs in Huizho are private rooms with couches and a big TV and sound system for karaoke. There are tables with dice in cups, not unlike in backgammon, so that you can play what is apparently the favorite CHinese drinking game. Akin, somewhat to poker, each player rolls 5 dice and tries to make the best hand (which is really just pairs, 3 of a kind, 4 of a kind, or a flush… no straights). The loser? The loser, of course drinks.

This part is pretty normal.

The not so normal part is when the door opens and 10 beautiful CHinese girls walk in. You pick one, or you don’t… it doesn’t matter. If you don’t like this 10, another 10 will be brought in in a few minutes… and another.. and another… and twins, etc etc. Eventually, you get the drift and there’s no stopping the parade until you acquiesce.

Once you do, congratulations(!) you’ve made a new best friend. You, shockingly, are very very handsome, and hilarious (even with the language barrier!). You are special. You are wonderful. It is all. about. you.

And this is not a bad thing. This is a beautiful girl, who has the softest skin you have honestly ever felt, and must assuredly have ideas about life and love and the world around you. This is a girl of the world. This is, clearly, your future wife.

Of course you know where this is going, and I did, too. Nothing could have been clearer even if she had been wearing a price-tag. What’s interesting, though, is that you wrestle with the moral dilemma the whole night. Prostitution is obviously not taboo here, so why not? She’s hot, right? You’re in a foreign country far away from home, and your hosts are trying to show you a good time. It would be almost rude to not partake.

But, alas, I didn’t. And as Tony pointed out to me when I drunkenly wrote to him seeking his sage advice:

id have pass too
i dont pay for it
plus my little fella needs to remain clean
plus you never know whose gonna jump you when youre at your most vulnerable

you did the right thing

i know the temptation was mighty

good work

Truer words were never spoken…
It woulda been cool though.

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