A word of advice: say you’re going to Walgreeens… no, seriously, say it out-loud. Thanks.

Say you’re going to Walgreens for sundry items from toothpaste to Blistex to Q-tips. At this particular Walgreens, after walking around and around for 10 minutes, you cannot, for the life of you, find Q-tips anywhere. You’re not going to ask anyone, of course, because that’s just not you for one thing; and, besides, the place is so small you can do a full lap in under a minute.

Eventually, you catch sight of cotton-balls out of the corner of your eye, and you insticintively know that the Q-tips are probably herding near by. Safety in numbers and all that. You look and look but fail again and again. Maybe behind that package of Wet-Naps? No. Out of stock? No. Between competing adult diapers? No.

Finally, close to the point of exhaustion, you see the tell-tale puffs of cotton upon stick. But wait… these aren’t Q-Tip brand Q-tips, they’re some fake knock-off, they’re simple cotton swabs. “What’s the difference?” you think. “None that I can see… and they’re only a dollar… for a thousand!”

And you buy them.

And you take them home, excited for their immediate use; after all, it’s been like 2 weeks since the Q-Tip box ran dry.

And you try them.

And you cry.
>
Lesson learned: always buy Q-Tip® brand Q-Tips.