One of my best friends is getting married this weekend. That’s weird. Is now when we all start to get married? Already?

When I was 10, I was going to get married at 25. At 29, I’m freaked out that my friend is getting married at 30. Let me say that again in a different way: I am stoked that he’s getting married, especially to her which I also love. I am freaked that that means that people get married around now.

People want the personal details, here’s a personal detail:

Every ex-girlfriend I’ve ever had is married. Every. Single. One.

What’s more, for the most part, they have all married the guy they dated directly after me. Yeah.

I’m not sure how to feel about that last bit. Actually, I am sure about how to feel about it, I’m not sure if I want to admit it. It makes me feel a few things, actually:

.: I am so awful that women want to get committed to someone else as quickly as possible. After all, with people like me running around out there, you’d better take what you can get.
.: I am so terrible to be with that it gives a greater appreciation for people previously thought of as “bastards”, “liars” or “a cheating asshole”
.: I am perpetually The almost One. Good enough to get women interested in the idea of long-term relationships, but not good enough to actually participate in it with me.

And a very distanct possibility:

.: I am actually so amazing and hard to get over, that women are driven to marry someone else just to try and forget about me.

Yeah, I don’t really believe that one, either.

At any rate, my friend is getting married! And that’s awesome! And I can’t really use enough exclamtion points to illustrate my happiness about it! Is this enough!! Or this?!!!! No!!!!!! Everything’s super-duper!!!!!!