floorpie

So that’s how they do it:
Where Babies Come From in Germany via LYD

70 e-mails to start a Monday is fine. Tuesday and Wednesday are OK, too, but Thursday is starting to get just plain rude. Friday, though, FRIDAY is just obscene. How am I supposed to slack off all day when I’ll have to reply to all of these e-mails… and then reply to the replies… and the replies of the replies to the replies?

There’s no way I can get all of my important internet surfing done under these conditions.

“Where has Dave been?” you find yourself not asking yourself outloud. Following up on your non-concern, you completely fail to send Dave an inquisitive e-mail asking his whereabouts. Not caring whether he is alive or dead, you continue about your daily routine of not thinking about Dave and instead concentrate on actively not remembering anything about floorpie.net.

Coincidentally, he updates with the following:

To my many legions of fans:

Sorry for the absence; I’ve been planning, implementing, and participating in this. I know you missed me terribly, I’ll try not to be too busy for you in the future!

-DAK

You yawn to yourself, completely unimpressed.

This is what bothers me about mass media. “Bomb components found at San Diego airport”

!!!

And then you actually read the article:

San Diego airport’s commuter terminal was evacuated on Tuesday after baggage screeners found what initially appeared to be bomb components but turned out to be a toy, security officials said.

Do we really need to have sensational headlines in today’s world? I don’t.

>More importantly, I’m sure you’ve heard by now that Rosa Parks passed away last night. As sad as it is, I feel fortunate that I was able to live in her lifetime, in a world that she helped create. Of course, I think anyone reasonable will tell you that there is still a long way to go in civil rights, but at least we’re no longer openly segregating people based on the color of their skin. Rosa, you will be missed.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but men and women are different.

You’re welcome.

I realized, during my most recent date, that so much of my energy is expended trying to be funny. I’m cracking jokes left and right. I’m poking fun at myself. I’m making silly noises. I’m telling stores with hilarious endings. I’m making witty observations… and I’m happy about it. I feel like I’m running live, like I’m scatting all over the place (the singing kind, not the other thing).

And then I think to myself, “And what is she concentrating on?” Looking beautiful is a given. Probably trying to make sure she doesn’t have spinach in her teeth… check. But what else? She’s telling interesting stories, that’s good; she’s saying a lot in body language, nice… but what else?

>I, of course, don’t know, as I’m not a woman.

Let’s try and think about this logically. When you hear a girl describe what she would like in a man, 9 times out of 10 one of the first things that passes by her lips is, “He has to have a great sense of humor… be funny.” So, it stands to reason that guys would try so hard to do so.
>
The thing is, I don’t understand what that means women do to attract a man… because last I checked, you couldn’t make your boobs grow just by thinking about it…

(see what I did there? I made a funny.)

You don’t know a lot about where I work, but the short summary is that I’m a product designer and I make consumer electronics and accessories for a number of brands. The point being, we have a couple of the new video iPods in the office to evaluate; and, I’ve been playing with it today.

Beautiful.

One thing I see in the foreseeable future, though, is people using a lot of time during the day getting caught up on their “stories”. I wonder what this will do to productivity. I am, in fact, watching/listening to an episode of Lost while I type this… which is probably evident from the relative poor quality of said post.

At any rate, the quality is really good (at least to my eyes), and I’m loving the whole idea of watching my favorite Golden Girls episode whenever and wherever the mood strikes me. The irony is not lost on me that I am only now interested in something like this now that Apple has done it (thereby ignoring the fact that devices similar to this have been out for quite a while). I’m no Apple fan-boy, I assure you. I’m not interested in owning a Mac, at least not as a primary computer, but I love my iPod, and think iTunes has definitely revolutionized, at least my, experience with downloading and listening to music. I was an original Napster lemming, and moved to Kazaa when Metallica got them in trouble, but somehow the interface, ease of use, and cheapness of iTunes has me happily paying for music again… and probably video in the near future.

I was sent this link by a friend of mine with just the subject “strangely therapeutic”. So SO true.

Bush in Freefall

I’ve had a lot of dates, lately. Or, more correctly, “a lot” for someone who has oft been described as a “serial-monogomist” (and delivered, by the way, like it was some kind of admonition). Each one has been, honestly, a struggle, and only slightly more entertaining than what I would have been otherwise doing (watching TV in my underwear covered in Cheetos dust). There was:

.: the girl that talked about what she needed in a boyfriend, and how that related to me… on a first date. Nevertheless, we went out ~4 times.
.: the absolutely gorgeous mountain biking girl that nevertheless talked about her ex-boyfriend for two hours… and then followed doing so (without any sense of irony) with, “…but I don’t have any issues.” Went out twice with probable re-enactment sometime.
.: the girl who literally, seriously, and without exaggeration said next to nothing for 4 hours. It got to the point where, crippled by my un-ending monologue, I stopped talking completely for 5 minutes just to see if she would say anything to fill the void. Eventually, after noticing how quiet it was and giving me a quizzical look, I said to her in only the way you know I can if you know me, “Oh, I wasn’t going to say anything until you threw out at least some small talk.” She laughed, then looked a little panicked, and said in earnest, “I’ve got nothing.” Yeah, no.
.: the girl who, really, is from a different place than me. I will say no more. Went out twice…
.: the girl I met at the place that asked my friend about me afterwards. Haven’t pulled the trigger on that one, yet.

I think the main issue with all of these girls, besides their obvious and overwhelming flaws (I keeeed), is that for the most part I’ve been pretty apathetic with them. They were all hott, some super hott, and most at least somewhat interesting; but, it seems to be true that there is this unspoken, unseen, something that triggers chemistry between people.

I’m a big believer in love at first sight (or at least ‘intense like’) having experienced it a few times in the past to great effect. I realize, though, that this isn’t the norm, and that I should give things a chance to click (thus the multiple dates with each). All thigns being equal, though, I’d rather the instant draw. To wit:

.: the girl from this weekend. Gone out with once. Had a great time, and made plans for a second. Has all 10 fingers and (presumably) toes. No immediately noticeable signs of The Crazy. Stunning. Interseting and funny; and, more importantly for my fragile ego, thinks I’m hilarious.

We’ll see what happens; you never know.

.: I've read 20 of what Time considers to be the 100 Best English-Language Novels from 1923 to Present. A dubious achievement considering that there isn't a cool acronym for any future awards ("Wow! I'm on the 100 B.E.L.N.P. list!"). 'Cool acronyms' being the yardstick for evaluating valuable awards, you see. (via bluishorange)
.: I've seen 18 of the Top 100 Movies